Today I woke up with a heavy heart due to it being the 1 year anniversary of my precious sweet baby girl Melissa Ann death. Oh how I wish I could turn back the clock; could I have changed the outcome if I am a true Christian I say the answer would be NO . Due to it is Gods choice when he calls us home and he needed her for a reason; yet one we may not understand or even like it that is the way it is. Trust me when I say I do not know how people who don’t know God as their Lord and Savior do it on a day to day basic. As I know I did not get through this last year without him caring me along with all my wonderful friend and family that helped us and prayed for us. We started the day just remembering her and missing her then after a visit to the cemetery (which was very painful) we would meet a group of my girlfriends to help us put up a memorial at the crash site. Melissa very best friend Chelsea came over Thursday night to help me make it; really she did all the work I just colored. Then today at 4 we did meet at the site and nailed it to the tree and wired flowers as well. My friend Michelle brought Melissa favorite flowers tulips and calla lilies and planted them. I pray they will be left alone but after the strip center made us remove the cross last year I am worried they will dig them up.
I wish I could explain how much this all hurts but there are no words to tell you exactly how I feel. I know she is never coming back but a part of me feels like this is a dream and I will wake up any time. I do remember this feeling when my dad died but to be honest not this hard so I know things will get better but hey I wish it would hurry up. Yes I know it takes awhile to go through the grieving process but you know I don’t have a lot of patience so I want this to be better now and every time I turn around there is something else happing that brings the pain full circle. We have had a total of 5 deaths in the Zingelmann family in a year. Now can I say God please stop we have had enough or how dare I after what he did for all of us as it is by his grace I can even vent my feeling on this horrible accident that happen not to mention losing a father n law, aunt, cousin and uncle. I should be praising God instead of feeling sorry for myslef.
As we celebrate Easter tomorrow I pray that if you don’t know Christ you will come to know him as it is through him that you will have eternal life and get to see Melissa again. I love you all to the moon and back!!!!!!!!
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| This is Christy,Larry,Me, Chelesa,Dottie,Robin,Eddie and Michelle just a few of my many friends who help me this year. My WOW class could have not made it with out you |
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| Here it is all finished and with plants planted. I pray it stays up long enough for Trey and Jon to get to see it. |
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